Tuesday, May 7, 2013

What Am I Waiting For?

It has been a typical weeknight here. The hubby took our oldest to a parent-child sports sampler class at the Y and the little one and I went to the grocery. I got home and was bringing the groceries in the door and honestly felt grumpy. That "here we go again" attitude. Our house had gotten a little messy over the course of the evening, more stuff to do tomorrow, groceries to put away, fridge to clean out, etc. Just felt kind of bleh...not in any way dreading tomorrow, but not really anticipating it like I should either.

Then I was standing there putting away groceries and my oldest started telling me about his class. He had volunteered to be the leader tonight! Surprising for my once-shy little guy. He got to pick the warm-up exercises and how many of each they did. He was demonstrating the jumps for me at home and decided he wanted to do 100. So I stood there smiling, watching him jump and count to 100, and watching our little girl toss her pink blanky over the air vent so she could see it blow up like a balloon. At that moment I realized, these are the days and nights that make up the memories of their childhood. These ordinary, simple days, spending time with Mom and Dad. This is what they'll remember. These are the things I remember about my childhood, too. So while I sometimes feel like I'm just rushing through this to get to the next exciting thing, I need to always be aware that these are the exciting things. I don't want to miss this! These are the evenings that will string together their childhood memories. Why do I feel like I have to wait for "something" to be happy and enjoy the moment? What am I waiting for? I should be enjoying the here and now, even if it seems mundane. So what? It kind of is. And that's what I've always wanted.

I don't usually have moments like this. Most often I really relish my time with my family. But from now on, if I ever catch myself just going through the motions, or losing the anticipation of the next fun day here on the homestead, I want to remind myself of this. The magic that is watching my kids dance around the kitchen floor, make up silly words together and giggle, each slip on a pair of my shoes and proudly make it across the floor in them, watching my oldest read new words with ease, watching my youngest count objects around the house...what an enormous blessing. Even though there will always be laundry to do and dishes that need scrubbed, there can be magic in the everyday if we stop to enjoy it and soak it in.

I don't want to rush through this, my kids will already be three and five later this year. Their childhood is going plenty fast enough. <3

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